Genesis 34: Teenagers and Relationships

Genesis 34:1-2 And Dinah the daughter of Leah, which she bare unto Jacob, went out to see the daughters of the land. And when Shechem the son of Hamor the Hivite, prince of the country, saw her, he took her, and lay with her, and defiled her. Genesis 34:7 And the sons of Jacob came out of the field when they heard it: and the men were grieved, and they were very wroth, because he had wrought folly in Israel in lying with Jacob's daughter; which thing ought not to be done.

What a tragic account.  It may well be that Dinah was raped by Shechem, but that is not certain.  "Took" does not always mean "forced" and "defiled" could refer to Dinah losing her virginity to a man that was not her husband.  Further, Shechem otherwise demonstrated good behavior towards Dinah.  A clearer description of an incident of rape can be found in II Samuel 13.  Nevertheless, Shechem's behavior towards this woman was an inexcusable act of lust.  He was wrong.  "It ought not to be done!"  So the answer to the question of "Did Dinah deserve this" the answer is clearly "No."

But if the question is "Did Dinah allow herself to enter into a compromising position," the answer is "Yes, she did."  Dinah left home to see the daughters of the land - what she had at home no longer interested her and she instead sought what was in the world around her.  The fact that she had 11 brothers and no sisters probably didn't encourage her to stay home!  But there was great danger in her leaving the safety of home, the oversight of her parents when she was still a young teenager (about 14 years old) and lacking wisdom in how to do deal with the smooth talking Shechems of the world and the ways of people that didn't know the Lord.  She left the safety of home and found herself in a vulnerable position.  Be cautious of the company your children keep!  Parents ought to know where their children are at all times, who they are with and what they are doing.  There are those that will influence them or take advantage of them!

Psalms 1:1 Blessed is the man that walketh not in the counsel of the ungodly, nor standeth in the way of sinners, nor sitteth in the seat of the scornful.

Proverbs 4:14-16 Enter not into the path of the wicked, and go not in the way of evil men. Avoid it, pass not by it, turn from it, and pass away. For they sleep not, except they have done mischief; and their sleep is taken away, unless they cause some to fall.

This leads to the point of this blog entry.  What was missing at home that Dinah sought for among the daughters of the land? What were her parents thinking? Where was her mother?  Titus 2:3-5 instructs older women to teach younger women to be discreet and chaste in their behavior.  If Rebekah taught her daughter this truth, perhaps Dinah would not allow herself to enter into a compromising situation.

Further, the heart of children should be towards their parents, not Shechem: Proverbs 23:26 My son, give me thine heart, and let thine eyes observe my ways.  Apparently, Jacob and Rebekah lost the heart of their daughter to the world - Dinah saw something in the world, the daughters of the land, that she was not getting at home.  Perhaps it was love or attention.  Parents should teach their children the Bible at home, spend time doing some fun things with them, teach them how to live life in a God fearing manner to ensure their heart is at home and not for the daughters in the land.  If parents keep the heart of their children, when they are teenagers they will want to talk to their parents instead of looking to get out of the house at every opportunity to run with their pack of friends or look for relationships on the internet.

And when we allow young people to enter into close relationships with the opposite sex, parents risk losing the child's heart to that boyfriend or girlfriend.  Note in v.3 that Shechem romanced Dinah with his kind words.  Shechem had an emotional bond with Dinah that she should have had with her father till she met her husband.  Parents that allow their teenagers to run in the dating scene is dangerous business!

If parents keep the heart of the child, young people will enjoy homelife and not seek for something in this world that will put themselves in a vulnerable position.